I Couldn’t Build This Alone
- Erin DeStefanis
- Aug 12
- 3 min read
Once I made the decision to turn Threads That Hold from an idea into a real business, I realized quickly I couldn’t do it alone. Drive, passion, and enthusiasm helped, but what I really needed was candor, feedback, and voices willing to push me further.
I started with family and close friends, asking if they’d support the initiative. The response was consistent: “You’re amazing. You can do anything! Also…I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
So, I stepped back. Alone again with the dream, I revisited old journals, notes, and leadership trainings. That’s when I returned to Lisa Barrington’s Forbes Coaches Council article, Everyone Needs a Personal Board of Directors. She describes a personal board of directors as diverse, honest, and unafraid to give real advice.
That, I realized, I already had. My professional community has never hesitated to offer candid feedback, diverse perspectives, and data‑driven challenges. Out of that came the Threads That Hold Advisory Board, a group of thought leaders who believed in the mission, the values, and the learning model. They came from nonprofit, public education, HR, corporate training, talent acquisition, and operations. Different backgrounds. Different perspectives. Different ways of seeing the same problem.
The most remarkable part? They serve as volunteer strategic advisors, offering insight and honest feedback without a formal hierarchy or organizational authority. Over the past three months, in anticipation of launch, they’ve challenged how I think about leading with empathy, building for sustainability, and creating the operational structure needed for growth.
As an introvert, I often retreat to the back of the room. I love programming and event design, observation, and studying how learning and operations connect. But they reminded me: to truly lead, I can’t hide. I had to reclaim my lost “teacher voice.” The “Mrs. De” voice needed to return. The voice I used standing in front of classrooms of 120+ students, guiding lessons, making decisions, and owning outcomes. I’d muted that voice when I moved into corporate spaces, convinced I needed more experience before speaking as an expert. They challenged that assumption. And they were right.
Leadership isn’t passive. At some point, I had to move from observing what was happening to actively steering it. I couldn’t stay in the back of the room and expect to lead from there. I’m still learning how to do that, but with their support, I know I’ll get there.
They also helped me see that empathy, service, and passion can coexist with resilience, directness, and laser focus. Hope alone doesn’t build a business. Behind the scenes, strategy, structure, and sustained effort matter. They pushed me to strengthen my voice and outline a path for growth.
Without them, I’d still be sitting cross‑legged in my office, surrounded by legal pads and Post‑its, dreaming about “someday.”
Coaching is a partnership. The Threads That Hold Advisory Board has modeled that partnership through listening, challenging, and offering insight. I’m grateful for every moment that left me thinking: “Daggnabbit. I need to do that. It’s going to be hard, but it’s necessary. I can do this.”
Maybe that’s one of the lessons I’m learning about coaching, too. Sometimes the most valuable person in the room isn’t the one who tells you what you want to hear. It’s the one who listens, asks the harder questions, challenges your thinking, and stays with you while you figure out what comes next.
That’s Threads That Hold.
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